“Marty, step forward please”
Marty somewhat hesitantly, noticeably nervous, and with furtive side to side glances, takes a small step forward, separating him from an awkward line of shifty, disheveled and unkempt, obviously misplaced losers.
“For outstanding analysis and fearless … some, nay most … would say reckless … prediction … you … Marty WayOut There …
have been awarded the prestigious, and we wanted to do this now, because we absolutely hate posthumous …
Prolific and Perilous Prognosticator Plaque
This honor is not easily won. In fact very few recipients survive to be able to collect on it. Even fewer can bear and live through the outcome. Hence it is not without heavy consideration for it even to be awarded. You, Marty deserve all of our admiration.
No one would have, could have imagined how accurate you have been. In recognition of this, the citation attached to the plaque reads”
‘ To Marty WayOut There. For your fearless forensic foretelling, your careful, consistent calculation of consequences, for your daring disregard of dire dilemma, and not least your willingness to abandon the moral high ground, this award is presented.’
… Marty, even though no one but you and I will ever know what the heck this is even about, you can be proud of your accomplishment. Congratulations!”